Happy 2021! As we came to the end of 2020, I wrapped up a year of an insane amount of personal change. Something I did for myself in 2020 was pull the trigger on a confidence course and it was probably in my Top 5 in 2020. Through this, I’ve learned more about self-awareness, self-confidence and developing strategies to tackle my goals as well as implementing changes to have the life I want – by being the person I already am. Not the person I think I should change myself into.
Enter in my thoughts on 2021. Every year, I feel motivated and this year, common questions I asked myself were things like, “How can I be healthier?” “Will I ever lose the weight again?” and “Will this be the year I blog more?” Through this course, I’ve finally figured out the flaw in that thinking and it’s because those questions come from a place of guilt, not of grace. See that negative mindset? Asking myself if I’ll be healthy automatically puts the thought of “You’re not healthy,” in my head. Asking myself if I’ll blog more automatically makes me think “You don’t blog enough.” Guilt, guilt, guilt.
Reframing these thoughts for 2021 as well as digging deeper behind how those thoughts got there in the first place has been my key for me to start living a life of grace, not of guilt (my confidence coach calls these limiting beliefs). “HOW can I be healthier, why do I want to be, and what can I do to get there?”
One of my favorite affirmations / thoughts / mindsets is the idea that there is nothing I can do that will make God love me more and there is nothing I can do that will make God love me less. He loves me how I am and I’m perfectly made in Him. He gives endless – and I mean ENDLESS – grace. Why do I guilt myself so much instead of living in His grace?
This has become my mindset this year when formulating my goals. So here are my 2021 goals, in no particular order.
- Implement a morning and evening routine.
- Smaller portions.
- Only eat sweets on days that have a 3 in them (3rd, 13th, etc) – with a few exceptions!
- Exercise three times per week.
- Try two new recipes a month.
- Read 24 books.
- Give myself more me time.
- Dry 2021 – with a few exceptions!
You’ll notice what’s not on there? Goals that only came from a place of guilt: things like my weight, my blog and my business. Feeling like I have to blog more, lose weight, build a successful freelance business (like Torey, you have a full-time job, a part-time job and a freelance client, you CAN slow down) just leads to me feeling like what I’m doing isn’t enough. Like who I am isn’t enough. And that’s just not true. I’m focusing on what fills me up, on what makes me happy, all the while understanding how, by being the person I already am, I can become the person I want to be. I’m looking forward to 2021 and living a life of grace, not guilt.
PS – “Call it Grace,” by Unspoken popped up on my Spotify right as I was finishing up writing this. Thanks for the boost, Jesus <3
Habit Tracker image courtesy of Megan Reed Creative + Design